Defend Your Dreams

We all have a million dreams… to do this, be that, have this and what not……

When we are kids and bursting with energy and there is no world to question us, we dream like all of them would come true one day. Let it be pirates on a lonely island and all the treasure or being a princess or an astronaut or a spy or an actor or the world’s best soccer player and so many more… The best part of all that was with every new day, there could be another dream added to our long list.

As we grow up, we learn to give up on our dreams.  Don’t we? Suddenly for every single dream we have to have an explanation, an annotation to mark logic. Gradually we let go of them because what could possibly be an answer to defend our dreams. Let alone explain it to someone else…

I wanted to be a million things when I was growing up- a cricketer playing with the Indian cricket team, a palaeontologist finding fossils and then suddenly finding live dinosaurs, an FBI agent, a mutant with all the powers from X- men, a Hollywood actress, one of the Charlie’s angels and just so many things that do not make sense at all now.

How I miss all those dreams… dreaming things need no explanations… they are just limitless imaginations. With the real world, things change and we have to be logical and reasonable atleast to everyone else.

                              

May be this is why everyone yearns to go back to childhood… but here we have to have answers and then all we had were questions… and questions are easier to ask……

Aren’t they?

*Image Source: Google Images

Dust Off!

Cleanliness is next to Godliness…

Well, whoever said that, must have done a great deal of dusting.

 

Yesterday was my day of re- ordering things. A week in bed can sure disorder more than just your body. My books lay haywire, my drawer was reasonably complicated and my clothes… well let’s just say that is another story.

The best thing that I did was tearing off all the pages from my diary of 2006- 07. What a waste of pages I must say here?

Blah...  blah… blahs and OMGs and Dear…… so and so………

I wondered whether any significant entry was ever made in those pages which I have been trying to hide from almost everyone in my home. .  Most of them would be lingering between odes of ‘Why me? ‘ and ‘God I won’t repeat that again…’. Yeah! I am talking about results and those grades that have tortured me throughout high school.  I was a good student except for that one terrifying paper that has been ever since like a mother- in- law hanging over my head and few other things that I have wasted my years with. Not that I can afford to reveal those secrets now so I think that they are better safely off from the world. Besides who cares as to know about them…

What? You do? Yeah… Consciousness Police… get a hang…

Whatever they were I am just glad that all of that is over and forgotten. And as far as the cleaning and re- arranging, I am just about happy that I could do it well in time to start again with my studies. It is surprising how a good amount of dusting can change how a place looks. And I should call my den ‘decent’ to maintain my sanity.

After all the hard work and sneezing, I would just salute to see it maintained in this order for atleast a couple of weeks. My biggest threat hmmm… to name one person…… hmmm… would be my sister. (Dear sister, I love you but you know what I mean here…)

After this just bursting to start off a good day. 

*Image Source: Google Images

A Wrong Gone Sunday

There are times when we feel stuck. I am talking about the times of our lives when there is a stiffness around the neck from just looking at the TV or the computer screen, all your hands do is press the buttons for changing channels and all your walking includes moving to your fridge to refill your supply of guilt!!!

Kinda familiar ain’t it?

No this is not the post break- up period but one of those times when the least of movements equals large amount of efforts. Mathematically, movement is inversely proportional to effort.

Well, that sums it up just right!!!!

This is the exact picture what my Sunday was. I had decided this with a stronger will- I said, “Sundays are gonna be fun days for me from now onwards. No work, only things that I would like to do on a Sunday.” So, happily declaring my philosophies for Sundays, I let myself sink in with the mood of the day.

Tick tock, tick tock……

Literally knowing each passing second is a serious malady. The philosophies are great motivators but your health has to accept them with equal grace too. I still don’t know what set off my migraine but it had decided to stick with me throughout the day and the night. What a waste!!!

There was absolutely nothing that attracted me for pursuit. Television is a soul’s blessing in times like these. My watchlist:

The Rugrats movie

Chicken Little

Sex and the City: Movie

Even after all this entertainment, I felt like trapped in a cocoon and desperately wanted to be outside. I couldn’t enjoy anything with all my heart and everytime I tried to, that migraine had decided to be otherwise.

So, with almost jobless though not a result of recession but self- unemployment, I actually yearned for work. Anything, almost anything…… even sums from arithmetic would have been an option…

Oh! Wait, I think I am over reacting here…… or just being melodramatic…

I decided then and there, tomorrow the first thing I am gonna do is, go for my walk. Enough of this caterpillar, cocoon stuff… I needed fresh air and some exercise would definitely help me… And definitely no more Sunday- Funday philosophies…

Get back in action tomorrow… I was excited by this thought and slept off after rounds of tossing and turning… this post should have been written at that time…

But the fact that I skipped my morning walk to write it has nothing to do with any of the aforesaid issues… it just happened…… like the last Sunday…

But this is not gonna happen again… After all, I have great plans for the next Sunday…

*Image Source: Google Images

The Shortest Twitter Account That Ever Happened

Twitter, Twitter everywhere……

I have had enough with this twittering stuff. Everybody is on Twitter… like a religion but with lesser rules and regulations…

Tweet….. Tweet…

And a person who took a year to get 100 scraps on Orkut would definitely want to know what is the craze all about.

Okay! I just got my hundredth scrap last night after being there for like a year. Not a proud thing to boast about but I never fussed about it but this Twitter thing has got me going.

Tweet….. Tweet…

So after, all the resistance I had been putting myself with for so many days, I said, “WTF, let me see…”

Then and there I entered into this world, nothing but a page and a text box with a limit of 140 characters. Nothing impressive (No offence intended to the people who are on Twitter!) except for that little blue bird on the top of the page and the Twitter lingo dictionary. That was impressive or it seemed so atleast for the fact that they don’t have it on Orkut.

My account would have been there for some five minutes or so and within the next 30 seconds it was gone.

And that is how- the shortest Twitter account that ever happened.

*Image Source: Google Images

Dear Body

I am following Debbie Ford’s 21 day Consciousness Cleanse. It is my fifth day today and it is called the Gift of Reverence. This is an especial day for me for the focus of today’s topic means a lot to me and would probably mean a lot to so many others out there…

We are supposed to write a letter to our body and here is my letter:

Dear Body,

I am writing this letter to you today on behalf of all those days when I have deliberately hurt you and disowned you. You know that I have this ritual of thanking you with every cell in me, on my birthday. But I cannot understand why I have made it a point to understand your worth only when it comes to my life and not otherwise.

No matter how I am and in what situation I was, you gave me a place to reside in and honoured me with the feelings of care, love and worth. I may have hurt you throughout the whole of my life and you still stuck up with me. I am writing this letter to you to tell you that I respect and love you for everything that you have bestowed me with. My every bruise is just a mark now, thanks to your healing power. Every fallen cell has been replaced and you sure must be trying harder to combat this pain that I have been having lately. And if you are finding it hard to do so, I understand it has been my neglect and I am sorry for my ignorance. You have been a stable form to help me dream big dreams, had it not been for you, I would have perished long before. Throughout all my sickness and ill health, you held the flagship of courage and patience and not to forget your memory to keep a track of anything wrong that may re- attack me.

I haven’t been kind to you and certainly neglected you throughout my teens and may be that is the reason why I ended up with whatever I lack today. I complain, crib and just forget the million things that you do without my knowledge. Silently working through the night even when I sleep and imagine I gave up my sleep for some a**hole. Dear body, I apologise for all those blunders, when I overate or when I didn’t eat at all.

But you are such a brave thing braving everything. It is time to remind me of your worth and that is exactly what you are insinuating at. I understand and I promise I’ll do everything that is in my power to attend to you. Please forgive me for my innocence.

When I left out milk, you still spared me with all the calcium you could make, when I left my hair un- oiled, you still bore it with perseverance, when I skipped my breakfast you still held onto my conscience and worse still when I provoked your dignity with self taunts and complaints about my hair, my height, my nose, my tummy, my brain, my colour and so many other things you forgive me like the Divine. I was such a kid to have overlooked all of those blessings you unconditionally rendered to me. To me, you have been so much more than just a body. You have taught me perseverance, courage, strength, confidence and most importantly a power to stride on even during the worse times.

For all that you have been doing for, I thank you will all my heart, silently smiling, for the heart also belongs to you. Everytime I skip my exercise or binge eat, remind me of things that you have done for me… I will not let you down.

With the love that you have taught me, I apologise for that every single moment when I have given up my esteem and debased you in turn. To every single cell that works in my body, from the hormones to the organs, I love you all. Thank you dears.

I love you all and thank you for loving me back. I can never be able to replace this love.

*Image Source: Google Images

Tragedies

You see the big list of Things I’ll do……

Yes! that one, on the right hand side. Well, to show some respect to that list, I took out my guitar. The last time I played ahem tried to play it, was some six months ago.

With the cold that I have been battling with for the past few days, it was a scene…

Sneezing, playing the Em chord…

Blowing my nose, playing the C chord…

And sneezing again.

Life can sometimes turn out to be a musical tragedy and I was living it today.

Like yesterday, it was a almost perfect start for a day… I woke up before time, got all of my things in the right order, was running ahead of time, looked like a beauty queen and started off for my class…

And guess what happens?

Take a guess! Go on!!!!

My slippers…… showed their faithfulness…

With still half the distance to walk, on the top that freezing cold with a running nose, it was the live version of the quote- Damsel in Distress.

Only here, no heroes to save the damsel.

So what did the damsel, I mean I did!

I looked, thought a bit, then took my slippers in my hand and walked and should I forget to mention- What a Walk it was!!!  

So as I said, tragedies and then some more………

*Image Source: Google Images

Scary Sunday

I know I should have never watched Paranormal Activity. But when was the last time human curiosity was beaten by any outer force. So, there I was packed in my blanket last Sunday afternoon, coolly waiting for the DVD reader to read the disk and get started with the movie.

Silence.

Silence.

Eyes enlarge… “F***!”

Relaxed!

“Here it comes……. S**t!

Oh God!”

Relaxed!

“She’s standing for two hours….”

Heart pounds… lub dub lub dub……

“What the hell is it doing??”

Silence……

“What the …..”

“F***, f***, f***!!!!!”

Were few of my reactions during the movie!!!!

Well, once the movie was over, my heart was still pounding and I didn’t expect it to calm down for some more time…

The biggest challenge was surviving the night….

Oh dear! Every single scene was played and re- played in front of my eyes. Like an ostrich buries its head in the ground when it spots a predator, I dunked myself in my quilt. But still, every scene was still playing in my head…

It has been four days and I don’t think the consequences of that Sunday are yet done with. 

*Image Source: Google Images

 

So Much!!!! Good!!

I could refrain myself throughout Christmas… New Year was a challenge and yet somehow that was pulled through… but it is this week after the holidays that has challenged me and truly I haven’t been able to live upto my own expectations. 

It has been food, food and more food… Sweet dishes everywhere and not a way to refrain!!! I would have just finished my lunch, relaxed every muscle in my mouth, taken my comfortable position in front of the TV…… suddenly…

Psst… Psst…

Am I going bonkers or is it just my over- glucosed brain going into a hallucination mode? Somehow, even with the happiest of people can go into binging and festivals are a mere mood setter…

So, the last two days, I have been tasting and liking and eating various delicacies and still convincing myself-

Tomorrow, just tomorrow I am gonna take on all that pounds of desserts and snacks I have been living on…

My first exercise was checking whether the weather was good enough to go for a walk… luckily, it wasn’t (more so it didn’t seem)… On second thoughts, tomorrow will be a perfect day for a start! Won’t it?

We have great plans tomorrow. We are going for a movie- a family outing. Isn’t it just great!!!! And who knows what else……… 

He! He! He!

*Image Source: Google Images

The Nose Job

Winters are hard in one certain thing- Bruises.

Those mild scratches can be anything else if not deadly. Why am I talking about bruises today?

Well, I have a strong reason and need to share this. One thing you get off martial arts is a body full of battle marks which are the result of either your achievements or your fools. Half of my body is screaming in unison, with extra inputs by my nose…

A kick, next a punch, another block and then BHAM!

AH!

My nose, my nose!!!!! 

You see what I mean?

For a moment, I checked and re- checked whether the poor thing was still in place. For the past few days, I have been having an awkward feeling about the shape of my nose… not that I would go for plastic surgery and fit a Barbie doll nose or something!

Luckily, no bleeding or broken bones…. [Sigh]

But today’s moment of epiphany has cleared any such thoughts. I can add, FOREVER.

*Image Source: Google Images

With Or Without Money

 It has been so long since I went to a movie.

Oh! My life sucks…

The last time I saw a movie on the big screen was some 6 months back. May be next month…this month my pocket money is dangling between my friend’s birthday present (that I don’t know what it would be) and my educational stuffs by which I mean stationary, books, stationary and then some more books…

How that crisp colored paper slips outta my hand every month before I could even count how much they were, surprises, scares and wrecks my nerves. It is not even the mid of the month and I have already said Bub- Bye to half of the hard earned amount (the several attempts to raise my pocket money).

Jokes apart!

I was in a hostel for a year and a half. Those days have the best of times to tell and equally the other half. Money in those days was just something more. Like most students do, I used to work then, to earn an extra sum that I could use for me only more like a fanatic. I remember, I used to go to work even when I had viral fearing a pay cut. I used to walk to my college to save money. The food in the hostel would be an easy graph to draw. It was like the recession curve- lower, lower, lower and then flat. 

What things meant then!

Good food- money

Relationships- money

Hanging out with friends- money

Taking off from work- less money

Travelling- money

Today, though, things have changed. Good food comes fresh and for free with the extra flavours of mum’s cooking, hanging out with friends means only one thing- FUN, no need to work, travelling is last thing that I would worry about and as for relationships- none till I am on my own. 

Let’s live happily with or without Money…

*Image Source: Google Images

In the Two Days

The first thing I would say is that I am still not over with the act of writing 2009 as the current year. Weird though that it has been 8 days to the New Year!! To my marked shame, I found that I have been writing 2009 almost anywhere you can write a date. Habits have strong foundation and less motives, I guess…

Alright, as for the reason for not blogging for two days, “Wait! I have an answer for that too…”. I have been more of “The Geekish Me” for the past two days. Not that I would call myself a geek or for that matter no one can suppose me to be a Geek, but it is true that I have been busy with my books. I should say that I would look more like this girl with her books, had not been for the smile…


What is there to smile while studying? Except if there was an unending supply of some guilty foods underneath your blanket!!! So, my days have been flying with an unusual pace and I am simply trying to catch up with its speed.

But, on the whole, two productive days and a feeling of great accomplishment!! That is if you can call them so.

About the other things, what can I say, they have been going pretty much the same way every other normal day should go on. And yes! This Saturday can become something different (Wait!!). My friend and I are trying to meet against all odds and let’s see, what that sums upto. We have been friends since high school but gotten closer only the past couple of years. High school friends are a good lot, atleast for me.

So, that is the plan for the weekend. I am supposed to get ready for my class now and so I gotta go dear people! I have still to write about so much and I should catch up with you all later.  

Till then… Signing off!

*Image Source: Google Images

Hell of a cold!!!!

I didn’t have much to write yesterday so I thought I would skip it. Actually I would like to say that I was experiencing the early symptoms of some form of depression. And if by chance I let that out here I am sure I would be sympathised by half and the other half would…… well I don’t know what the other half would say… so I am trying to save my face here.

No!!! It’s not a break- up.

Anyways, of all the least significant things I could have written, I am choosing to write about the weather that has in some notorious way making headlines for the past three days.

Hell of a cold!!!!

It has been like Alaska here- no sun, just the cloud cover and ‘The Fog’. Oooooh!!! Shivers run through my spine. The water, I try to avoid every contact with it. Suddenly this evening, I started to stress my brain and it gave out a very sensible thought. Listen to this-

I pity my hands whenever they come in contact with icy, cold water, poor Jack, being in that cold Antarctic waters…… It would not have been lesser than hell…. Kudos dear boy, love is blind but it sure is sensitive to weather!!!

We have been glued in and around the heater and to be true I can feel my hands and feet only then…

And yeah, the best thing…… Oh I love this weather for one thing- while walking, a flash of wind sets you hair to dance and come over your face- and truly- I feel no less than a heroine… Ahhh…… (Drumrolls) It is funny though but I enjoy it.

But the worst part- getting ready in the morning for my classes… that is a punishment you are enforced with… don’t know from which birth. I see my sister, by the way, her vacations are on, enjoying the warmth from the heater and the coziness of the quilt everytime I come back. Your Highness glows in that warmth and I, poor darling, can’t even feel myself…

Well all I can say is- “Every dog has a day.” And mine is on its way.

I am not calling my sister any names… alright!!!

And yes, in my karate class today, we had to bear the brunt of our teacher. She made us do sports karate and that means- a form of kick boxing. I have bruised my leg and now it has swollen black & blue. What a scene- Keeping a pack of ice in this cold… Bravo my guts!!!

Hey, it’s 12. 06 am and I am still seated here… I better go. I don’t have any class tomorrow so I guess God’s not gonna send me to hell if I sleep for some extra hours.

See you tomorrow, if that is……

Toodles!!!!

*Image Source: Google Images
 

It Could Have Been Better but Who Cares!!

I am done with all the spirit that a New Year can bring. To begin with I had to wake up early for my class and then as if the world had nothing better to offer, I was taken down and beat by a weird feeling in my head and stomach……

I said, “No way, this is not happening.” But things had decided to go otherwise. After an hour of “God please make me fine, I won’t repeat that agains” and “God, why me?”, I had given up happily to skip my class. Guess, after all, there are better things…

Then there were the long list of phone calls and texts to be done away with and once that had been taken care of, I did some dishes and prepared some breakfast with the gracious help of my sister. Then I thought let me cut myself some slack and laze around doing nothing. On second thoughts, I took up my computer books to try design a new template for my blog. With an eager enthusiasm, I started off and with the same enthusiasm; I put them neatly back in my book rack.

At lunch time, I watched ‘What Happens in Vegas’. Funny, sweet and yet somehow incomplete (no offence though!). It’s around three in the evening and I have a karate class at 4: 30. I seriously think, I could have spent a better half day than I did today. Thank goodness, these everyday things aren’t entered into any college records. 


It’s almost nearing an hour since I am back from my karate class. It was a good work out today. Lots of kicks and some good stretching exercises!!! It’s been more than a year now since I started my karate lessons. I love it though sometimes I feel grumpy to go but in the end it always excites me. We have been doing ‘Katha’ or ‘Pre- planned Fight’ for so many classes now and I desperately miss ‘Sports Karate’. By the way, that’s when we fight, dreaming to become Bruce Lee one day.

I find no other thing to engage myself with and I am just waiting for supper time coz I am hungry and cold.

Oh yeah! Just remembered it- I have plans to catch two movies- ‘Freaky Friday’ and ‘Bedtime Stories’ i.e if I get my hands on the remote at the right time.

Till tomorrow…… Ciao

And yes!! Happy New Year once again…………..

*Image Source: Google Images

Sometimes I Write Well

Sometimes I write like an item. These are some of my very ‘favie- favie’ ones….  Read along and enjoy… Get a tissue. Some are ‘senti- menti’ ones too…

It's Just Me

What's Not to Like

I Choose

I'm Feeling Grateful

Just In Case I Forget

They're the Ones

Without You

Fun Learning

Dear Body

With Or Without Money

Still Like the Past Year!!!

Happy New Year!

Last year on this day, I was watching ‘The Pirates of the Caribbean- Trilogy’ on Star Movies. I remember, when I finally went to bed, it was somewhere around three in the morning. What a way to start off with a new year, you might say. But that was last year. This year I still can’t sleep. There isn’t anything interesting on TV and so I took upto writing. Speaking the truth, I am very much excited about the blog and cannot imagine myself sleeping just now.

It is 1 am in the morning and I am sitting in front of my system in my room. My legs are frozen and my fingers aren’t any better. It has been quite a show of weather since the past couple of days and I don’t hope it to get any better. Well, so as I was saying, I couldn’t sleep… I wished my sister ‘Happy New Year’ with all the enthusiasm I could muster up at this time. She, by the way, is listening to songs in the next room, hardly having a clue that I am making her famous by writing about her. She just celebrated her birthday, this 26^th and what a day it was!!!!

I also just managed to help myself out of a migraine which I am sure is a result of the piece of double layered chocolate cake that I had in the evening or the cold air that I had been exposing myself to… Now that I am a survivor, it is just another story.

I have a ‘My Happy Life’ notebook in which I write my everyday happy moments. I wrote my last happy moments of the year that went past. I did some decoration here and there, some colouring, and some patterns to remind me to update the dates…

No calls or texts so far for me… Hoping that tomorrow is another day!!!!

*Image Source: Google Images